(July, 2006. New York, New York.)We all have camera faces. Sometimes I envy the first photographers, I don't know if it was easier to shoot people in the moment then, with the subjects not thinking about putting on another face before the shutter fires, or perhaps not knowing to yet.
Remove the glasses, smooth the hair, chin down, smile, pose. I do it too, I know. We've been trained to do it growing up. Some of us do it less, some of us do it more. Or like Katherine here. Pijus will attest to this: if you point a camera at her, she'll quickly turn away, or stick her tongue out and make a face. It's probably an extreme example, but it's a defense mechanism. In that way we're still in control. It's about control and representation, how our image will be seen on a screen or on a print. We want to be seen a certain way, ready, composed, presenting, not human and flawed, vulnerable and open as we can be.
I don't think it's all bad. I like the pictures of me and my friends and we're all smiling at the camera. It's appropriate sometimes, and everyone's just having fun. But I like the ones where we're just in the moment and being ourselves too, and most of all I do think it's one of the challenges of shooting, what is to me, meaningful portraiture. I feel like I can do a headshot in my sleep, but my eyes would slide right off of the gloss. Richard Avedon once said that the surface is all we have to work with, and it's true. For me, ultimately, it's about emotion and light. Get past the smile and the glamour shot, what I want is expression and emotion.
That's, something I was thinking about today.
4 Comments:
well, must i weigh in with the old "stealing soul" adage...? you bring up excellent points about control.
some people i know, no matter how beautiful they look in a photo, they cringe & writhe & wail about how awful etc etc...i know we all see ourselves in a certain way, and that comes across, why some photos of ourselves please us, while others make us twitch..
i like your blog & you.
some people i know, no matter how beautiful they look in a photo, they cringe & writhe & wail about how awful etc etc
It's also a question of what we think "beautiful" is. If we think a smiling glamour shot is the standard for presenting oneself, a snapshot of a contemplative moment might not be, if we're not open to it.
i know we all see ourselves in a certain way, and that comes across, why some photos of ourselves please us, while others make us twitch..
Part of it is how we see ourselves, or how we want others to see us. It's about the image we wish to project and present, or sometimes even actively construct. From the celebrity who needs all blemishes removed and whose publicist needs to approve all photos being used, to my mom of whom I have so many in between shots of her taking her glasses off or smoothing her hair. I've shot a very pretty girl, who insisted on being shot facing right and won't turn the other way because that's "her good side."
When we are presented with something alternative to that self image, or projected image, it may become hard to accept. Oh, I look too old/tired/ugly/fat, that's such a bad angle of my face, I wasn't properly composed. I've seen pictures of myself where I went, "Oh dear. That really isn't very flattering, is it." But guess what? You're not a picture. People around you see you from all angles, under all lighting circumstances, without any editing or retouching. You're the only one who doesn't see yourself often enough.
(I love you too! Thanks for writing.)
"You're not a picture. People around you see you from all angles, under all lighting circumstances, without any editing or retouching. You're the only one who doesn't see yourself often enough."
*nod* And for those who know you, a photo evokes associations (of actual memories of seeing you, and perhaps much more) that you don't have...
--Eric
Every now and then, I feel like setting up a video camera and letting it run for a while, just to see what I look like moving about... :P
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